- Written by Pastor Melvin Santos
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We are facing a crisis of singlehood--a generation of people who are unmarried. There is nothing wrong in being unmarried. God does not expect or demand that everyone gets married. But the crisis is not a crisis of preference or a crisis of calling. It is because there are a generation people with NO ONE TO MARRY!
With the secularization of culture, the view of marriage is no longer held at its historical esteem. The natural processes of mating, the natural processes of connecting have become damaged, so that which is normal --- where boy meets girl, and girl meets boy, and they get married, have been interrupted by sin, circumstances, and secularism.
So for many singles ---what they don’t need is a mate BUT a MIRACLE!
If you desire to be married, and you do not feel that your singlehood is related to a calling or preference, THEN what you need is to FAST and PRAY to FIND the RIGHT person in life! Let me suggest 4 points in finding the right person.
1. Commitment to God-- How strong is their relationship and commitment to God? Do they LOVE Christ and have a relationship with Him? Do they go to church regularly whether you come or not? Believing in God is not enough. Do they really live their faith? That’s what you need to figure it out. A commitment to God says I don’t know how God is going to do it, and when He’s going to do it, but I’m going to trust Him.
2. Confidence in God – If you make the commitment and walk in faith ---then God has somebody for you! Follow God and He will lead you to the right person.
How do you exercise confidence in God? Don’t STAY home! There’s nothing wrong with LOOKING for the leading of God.
The Bible says, Proverbs , “He that finds a wife finds a good thing.”
If you WANT to find someone -- then you have to look for him or her. Don’t be lazy and expect God to just drop him or her on your lap. But if you’re committed, then you’re NOT looking in the “nightclubs”. Let God lead you to His movement in your life.
But remember -God is always Sovereign. He has the RIGHT to give you someone different and better. Live by the principles of God and find somebody else who does. And the key to success in marriage is--- to make sure you’re living with these principles. Marriage was NEVER designed to make you happy! You’re supposed to be happy in the first place!!
3. Character before God. When you’re dating, keep your head clear and your eyes open. Look at how they act and more importantly how they react. Anybody can act. Reacting is hard to fake. When the pressure builds, how do they react then? Don’t look for the superficial, but look for the character. A character will last a lifetime. If you want to find the right person, you need to be the right person. Be a person of character, moral purity, dignity, and kindness.
4. Confirmation by God- When the Lord is in it, somebody else is going to see it. If you’re the only person who sees that he or she’s the right one, then something is wrong. You ALWAYS want others who LOVE the Lord, to confirm the right person.